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Dear Ask The Blackman,

I have recently got through a rough divorce with my ex-wife. I caught her cheating on me. I want to move on with my life and start dating people. My confidence is not where it used to be. Can you give me any advice on how to get it back?

-Lost In Space

The Black Man:

Hi Lost In Space,

What you are going through is probably a really rough phase emotionally. I suggest giving yourself some time to go through the motions of this and heal the wounds of the past relationship. Sometimes only the hands of time are the best remedy for this.

If you are looking to date I strongly recommend keeping it light and do not get into anything serious for a while. Have fun and enjoy the company of your dates.

To meet people to date I suggest going to events where you can mingle with people on a communal level like mixers, cocktail parties, etc.

If you have any hobbies join some groups that partake in those particular hobbies. You can also join some online dating sites (ahem…Blackplanet?) that make it easier to meet people.

Give it some time and be open and you should have your mojo back in due time.

Good Luck.