Engagement season has hit hard! Some girls take it harder than others, but there a few ways that you too can make it through the love fest without passing out from all fairytale proposals.
Ok, so, quick confession: When I wrote about December being peak engagement season, there is no way I could have predicted exactly how many I would hear about in one week!
I’m ecstatic for the wonderful women in my life that are getting their Happily Ever After. Thankfully, I’ve figured out how to be happy for them without being sad for me. Unfortunately, lots of other single women are still mastering that ability.
Before you bury yourself too deep in your emotions, here are some things to keep in mind that can help you make it through Engagement Season with fewer negative feelings.
1. Don’t Make Comparisons
When someone flashes a ring in your face, lots of single women find it hard not to think about their relationship status (whether they’re in a committed relationship or not) and the progress of their love life. This has got to be the biggest mistake any of us can make. Remember: their relationship is not a reflection of where you’re at. Someday your prince will come (if that’s what you want), and he’ll be amazing for you. Your friend getting married is not about you, nor does it reflect badly on you by comparison. It just means she’s getting married, and you get to keep doing your thing as your own fabulous self.
2. Don’t Give Into The Pressure
You know how they say good things come in threes, right? When one person in your circle announces an engagement, it’s not long before everyone gets around to asking you when you’re going to settle down. Let that be their mystery to ponder. Don’t you go rushing off to be with anybody that will have you just to say you have somebody. For those of us in relationships, don’t start pressuring your man to commit just because you want to be the newest sister in Beta Theta Beta, the Bride-To-Be Sorority. Everything happens in its own time; love and marriage are two things you don’t want to rush. In the mean time, have fun dating around (or enjoying your relationship, if you’re attached) and figuring out what you want.
3. Engaged Ladies Are Facing A Whole Bunch Of Stress
If you break it down, preparing a wedding is really just planning an event. This event, however, comes with everyone you know throwing in their opinion on what your day should look like. That’s not to mention having to figure out who’s going to get an invite, and where they’re going to sit at the reception. There’s also booking vendors. And did we mention calculating a budget? It’s a lot. It’s fun, and it’s mapping out one of the most joyful events in your life–but it’s still a LOT! If you’re feeling a bit down about being single, maybe you can pull yourself out of your emotional spiral by bringing your soon-to-be-married friend a cup of coffee or just having a good ol’ girls night in where they can unwind. She’s going to need it. That brings me to my next suggestion.
4. Schedule Some Time To See Your Friends
Just because your friend is getting married, doesn’t mean she’s completely going to vanish from your life. She’s jumping the broom, not moving halfway around the world. Is she going to have as much time for you as she once did? Maybe not. But that shouldn’t stop you from making an effort to still spend some time with her. Not to mention, you probably also have a whole other crop of friends to hang out with. You’re going to be so busy having a blast with your girls and getting your life, you won’t have as much time to think about why you’re not married yet.
5. Allow Yourself To Be Sad For A Moment
Realistically, no one can be happy all the time. There are bound to be a few moments where you feel a bit down about this new chapter in your friend’s lives. That’s ok. Take a moment to feel your feelings. Just don’t get stuck in your sadness.
6. Engagement Season Only Lasts Until January 2
It only seems like everyone is getting engaged now, but this too shall pass. Remember that you will only be faced with this onslaught of engagements during the holidays. After New Year’s Day, things tend to quiet down until Valentine’s Day. It should be easy enough to ride this out, considering you’re probably getting ready for a holiday with your family.
7. (Briefly) Think About Your Dream Wedding
Part of the fun of seeing your girl through an engagement is that you get to flip through bridal magazines and click through wedding websites. While you’re browsing, it’s entirely likely that you picked up a few ideas for the wedding you one day hope to have. Instead of trying to act like plotting a dream wedding isn’t even a little bit fun, indulge the idea for a few minutes then go back about your day.
Above all else, never forget that you still get to be your kind of happy. Your girl is getting married, but you’ve still got some great things going on for yourself. Celebrate those things about you, and it will be easier to celebrate with your friend as she gets ready to take a major step in her life.