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Domestic Violence Victim at Safe House in New York

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In a heart wrenching interview with TV One’s ‘Sister Circle,’ Andrea Kelly, singer R. Kelly’s ex-wife, reveals the moment she discovered she was a victim of domestic violence in her relationship.

Kelly revealed her revelation came in a moment of deep pain, when God told her to type ‘domestic violence’ into her computer.

“I’m not that girl,” she said tearfully, typing in the words in disbelief. “I’m not the teeth missing. I’m not the broken bones girl.” But Kelly kept scrolling and stumbled upon a 17 item questionnaire that helped her grasp the extent of the abuse.

“They ask has your abuser ever done…and of the 17 [questions], Robert had done 15 to me.”

Although the realization was shocking, being able to label the behavior as domestic violence was the key to her freedom.

If you feel you are the victim of domestic violence, here are some things to look out for in your partner’s behavior:

  1. Does your partner keep you from going out or doing things that you want to do?
  2. Does your partner’s behavior make you feel as if you are wrong?
  3. Do you feel obligated or coerced into having sex with your partner?
  4. Does your partner say that if you try to leave, he or she will kill himself or herself or you?
  5. Do you lie to your family, friends and doctor about your bruises, cuts and scratches?
  6. Does your partner criticize you or embarrass you in front of others?
  7. Do you watch what you are doing in order to avoid making your partner angry or upset?

You can take the whole questionnaire here. 

The interview with Andrea is below:


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7 Signs Of Domestic Violence You Need To Look Out For In Your Relationship  was originally published on