“All things fashion from a straight guys perspective” Mac Style: Food. Fashion. Freaks. “Living well from a gentleman’s perspective.” Man. We have got to talk about these skinny jeans people. Now, I’m all for Beyoncee or Buffie trying to squeeze on a pair. Forget NBC, “That’s must see TV,” even the Mac would pay to watch. And you know my girls out there like Rihanna and Kelis can rock that look anytime they want.
But there is a line folks, that shouldn’t be crossed. When are skinny jeans too skinny?
Answer:
When dudes are wearing them. I don’t care if you’re straight, gay, bi or have a barn full of “girlfriends,” there are some things that men just weren’t meant to do: have babies, use the bathroom together and wear skinny jeans. I don’t care if you’re Kanye West or Will Smith – we don’t need that much information about you. The other day I was hitting up my favorite movie spot and I see all these youngbloods in the concession lines sporting pants so tight it looked like it hurt to breathe.
Besides looking a bit effeminate – more power to you if that’s what you’re going for – the jeans handicap you from fulfilling the essential duties of a man. How’s a man gonna protect his woman when he can’t even move his legs in a fight, or for those of you out there more concerned self-preservation – run? And there’s no telling what all that tightness is doing to your “boys”. Wear those things too many times and you just might be the last of your line. Hmm.
Now that I think of that maybe the problem will solve itself. Until that glorious day, though, help me out fellas. You see your boy in some skinny jeans, get that fool to the mall, Wal-Mart – even Goodwill if his money’s not straight – and get him some “big-boy” pants. One day he’ll thank you. ! I’m not going to lie to you. I was it back in the day. From my shell toe Addidas to my herringbone chain that laced my neck I was the man. You could catch me on the court in my court straight dunking on fools with my Karl Kani’s hangin’ if I didn’t have time to hit the house for some shorts. And every now and then from the hat perfectly-poised on my head or the Jordan jersey hanging on my shoulders – I have to admit it – a tag did hang. That’s my confession to you.
Why did I share this information? To show you that even I’m not perfect. As a young man I rocked my clothes every now and then with the tag still on ’em. Why did I do it? Because I was too damn fresh I suppose. Still, like most boys eventually do I grew up into a man and realized the folly of my ways. I have much respect for the younger generation but it’s time to end the tag madness. The trend has been making a comeback for some time and as a veteran of that first war I’m just trying to save as many people as I can from making the same mistakes I did. It’s not about the price of the clothes folks, but the quality. And a true player doesn’t wear tags because he knows the clothes don’t make the man. You ever notice that rich people – I mean really wealthy people and not just “hood rich” – never leave their tags on their clothes? That’s because they know their worth, you know it and they don’t have to advertise. Tags are for wannabes and for those without the confidence to pull off a $5,000 suit without telling others
